What struck me was over the last three years of separation all these dates would get me depressed. I would retreat into a shell and analyze everything that occurred, beat myself over things I think could have been done to save that marriage, feel guilty for all that I did in the past. Not anymore. I still think but not to feel guilty or depressed.
I think about the good times, the bad times and move on.
They are just dates after all and dates don’t rule my life.
The people who love me, who have stood by me through thick and thin, people who have told me “it’s ok this is life and tomorrow will be better. Just get up and walk we are there to help you stand in case you fall,” these are the people who rule my life.
Not people, psychotic perhaps for whom no sacrifice was too great, no love was enough, people who always wanted more, who wanted to take away “me” as a person and replace it with a living senseless obedient robot.
I am at peace today.
True, my divorce looks like a long way off.
True, I still find people giving me strange looks when I say I am separated and awaiting a divorce like it is all my fault.
True, I feel like a criminal for something I did not commit every time I step into a court.
True, my friends are all happily married and some with kids of their own.
But it is true too that today I am a woman with self-respect, peace and living life again with positivism and love.
Just believe in LIFE.
Just live LIFE
Remember life is too short for the ifs and buts. Listen to your heart and head too and believe in yourself. 🙂
By Jamais Moi Meme